How could I focus on the present when my head was still swimming with questions, confusion, and quite honestly – an oncoming migraine! Dammit. I thought this place was supposed to be safe? No pain? And I’m already hot, thirsty, and annoyed. “What are you even doing?” I asked my clone as he continued digging.
He responded: “Listen Nitsua, the only water we have been able to find has been underground, in small tunnels. But it’s limited.”
I calmed down “Okay, Let me help,” I bent to my knees and began digging my fingertips into the sand.
My clone smirked and gestured to the others, “Come on everyone, you know the drill, let's show Nitsua how it’s done”
Another me instantly refused “No honey, I just painted my nails.” There were a few chuckles as the clone flashed his bright blue fingernails at us. There was something mesmerizing about his painted fingernails, maybe it was their bright blue, or the look of joy on his face. Back on Earth, Only women were allowed to care about “trivial” things like painted nails. Any man with painted nails would have instantly been sent away by The President. I looked down at my own fingertips, covered in sand and sweat and wondered how they would look if they were also blue.
Then one of the clones shouted, “Over here!” “Someone bring their artefact. I found a puddle of water here!”
The way they rushed over to get the water from the sand… you would have thought they had found gold. At that moment the novelty of them being my clones wore off and I looked at each of them individually. It struck me how tan they were – tan and yet somehow their lips were pale, the way lips get when you don’t drink enough water.
One of the clones managed to collect some water in a small glass bubble-looking container. He attached it to a harness he was wearing and simultaneously all of the clones sighed in relief.
One clone immediately piped up and said “This won’t be enough,” And another suggested that we have to keep looking. But that is when the clone with the blue fingernails said what we all must have been thinking… “Honey, I’m exhausted. And parched. I think this is enough for today”
The man who found the water agreed and suggested that we go back to the village and filter the newly found water so everyone could have a small sip.
The clones began walking toward the village.
But I was confused… We were supposed to split that tiny bit of water between us? “HEY! Shouldn’t we keep looking?” I asked, even more annoyed than before. And also concerned for my clones… they needed water!
“It’s no use. Come on.” The authority in the appointed leaders voice made me uncomfortable. They seemed to think they had it all figured out here. I didn’t escape Earth to be bossed around, to be thirsty, to be excruciatingly hot I thought to myself… but I followed anyway. If there was a village of some sort, maybe there was comfort there.
As we walked, I saw two men take each other’s hands. Immediately I felt… discomfort. It was such a simple thing But I was so used to it being forbidden.
Why was I so uneasy? Maybe I don’t belong here…